Wonderful

Wonderful

Many years ago, I worked at the California office of WATG (Wimberly Allison Tong & Goo), one of the world’s leading hotel design firms. At the time, WATG enjoyed an outstanding reputation in the hospitality design industry and was widely regarded as the No. 1 hotel design firm in the world.

Back then, we were involved in the design of a very famous project—the Venetian Resort Las Vegas. It was a huge project with extremely demanding design requirements, bringing together designers and professionals from many different backgrounds to create this impressive hotel.

It was during that time that I met a designer on the team. He was probably in his forties or fifties, and I believe his name was Steve. He had been transferred from WATG’s headquarters in Hawaii to the California office to work on the project.

One day, while chatting during a break from work, our conversation somehow turned to my educational experiences in China. I mentioned some of my classmates from middle school, college, and graduate school.

As we talked, I suddenly remembered that Xiaohong Wu had also worked at WATG’s headquarters in Hawaii. So I casually asked Steve:

“Do you know Xiaohong?”

To my surprise, he answered almost immediately, without the slightest hesitation:

“Wonderful human being. She’s a wonderful human being.”

In other words:

“She’s a wonderful person. A truly wonderful person.”

He said it so naturally that it seemed he did not even have to stop and think about it. That spontaneous response made a particularly deep impression on me.

At the time, I never imagined that so many years later, I would still remember those words.

Ever since then, whenever I hear the word “wonderful” in English, I can’t help but think back to that conversation in the WATG office. I remember Steve, the designer who had come from the Hawaii headquarters, and I remember the words that came so naturally from him:

“She’s a wonderful human being.”

In reality, you don’t always need to look at someone’s résumé to know how well they have done professionally. And you don’t necessarily need to hear how they describe themselves.

Sometimes, the most interesting evaluations come from other people.

Especially when someone doesn’t know that you are going to hear what they say, and has no reason to deliberately praise you, a spontaneous compliment may actually be the most genuine kind.

Steve had no idea what my relationship with Xiaohong was, nor did he imagine that I would remember his words for so many years. He simply heard her name and naturally responded:

“Wonderful human being.”

Those words have always made me feel warm.

Looking back many years later, I think the fact that Xiaohong was able to work at a top hospitality design firm like WATG—and to leave such a positive impression that a senior designer from the company’s headquarters, someone who had worked with her, immediately responded “wonderful human being” when he heard her name—says a lot about how well she must have done there.

What makes me even happier is that we were not only classmates; we also shared the experience of being students at the same university.

To have someone speak of a fellow alumnus in that way is, in its own way, something to be proud of for South China University of Technology.

But over the years, I have gradually realized that this invisible connection among alumni has another very interesting meaning.

When one alumnus does well in another country, that person can often create opportunities and make things easier for younger alumni who come later.

This influence is not always intentional or planned. Sometimes it may be nothing more than a chance encounter, a familiar name, or a piece of work from years ago. Yet something that seems so small can help someone who comes later avoid many unnecessary detours.

That reminds me of another experience from my own life.

When I was a graduate student at the University of Southern California (USC), my advisor was a graduate of Harvard Graduate School of Design. Several years later, another younger alumna from our university, Yang Yang, applied to a university in North Carolina and received a graduate scholarship.

As it happened, my former advisor had also moved there around that same time and became the department chair.

And so, a very interesting “alumni chain” was formed.

Yang Yang and I were fellow alumni from South China University of Technology, but later, after we both came to the United States, we became connected again through our shared academic advisor.

Even more interestingly, when Yang Yang was working on her thesis, my advisor gave her one of my papers from years earlier as a reference and example.

Looking back now, I probably never imagined that a paper I had written many years earlier would one day be used as a reference by a younger alumna from South China University of Technology who had later come to the United States.

And at the time, I certainly never imagined that some of the experiences I accumulated while studying and working in America might, in some small and unseen way, become stepping stones for younger alumni who came after me.

That is actually a very meaningful kind of legacy.

The people who come before plant the trees; the people who come after enjoy the shade.

One person goes out into the world first and establishes a foothold in an unfamiliar environment. When those who come later venture out, they may discover that someone has already left a few traces along the way—a name, a piece of work, a mentor, a company, or even simply the words:

“I know this person.”

These things may seem small. But for a young person who has just graduated and arrived in a foreign country, they can be incredibly valuable.

That is why I have increasingly come to believe that being an “alumnus” is about much more than simply having attended the same school.

The real value of an alumni connection is that after someone has gone far enough, they can still leave something behind for those who come later.

It might be a little trust.

It might be an open door.

Or it might simply allow someone to know:

“Others from our school have already walked this path.”

And when I think about Xiaohong’s story today, I find Steve’s words even more meaningful.

When that WATG designer, Steve, heard her name all those years ago, he said without hesitation:

“She’s a wonderful human being.”

Perhaps that was not only one of the best compliments anyone could give Xiaohong personally.

From another perspective, her professional achievements in the United States also helped build a little more trust and confidence for the younger alumni from South China University of Technology who would later leave China and pursue their careers in America.

Just as my own experiences may, without my realizing it, have helped pave a small part of the road for those who came after me.

Each of us may unknowingly become a tree along someone else’s path.

When we plant that tree, we may have no idea who will one day come and sit beneath its shade.

And perhaps that is one of the most beautiful and meaningful forms of legacy among alumni.

So now, whenever I hear the word “Wonderful,” I think not only of Xiaohong Wu.

I also think of all the Chinese students and South China University of Technology alumni who have worked hard and built their lives far from home, as well as the paths that people like us—the “ones who came before”—have walked in America.

Perhaps every one of us has, at some point, walked beneath the shade of a tree planted by someone else.

And without even realizing it, perhaps we have already planted a tree for those who will come after us.

Wonderful.

A simple English word that, because of one casual conversation many years ago, became one of the warmest words in my memory.

“A wonderful human being.”

Those are words I still remember, even after all these years.

What Is “Ghost Pressing” During Sleep?

​What Is “Ghost Pressing” During Sleep?

—My Personal Experience and Reflections on Science, Faith, and the Unexplained

Many people may have experienced something like this:

You are sleeping at night when, suddenly, you feel as though you are awake. You know exactly where you are and can even sense the room around you, but your body refuses to move. You cannot move your arms or legs, and when you try to call out, no sound comes from your mouth.

Even more frightening, you may feel as though someone is pressing down on your chest or sitting on top of you. Sometimes, you may even sense that there is a strange “presence” in the room.

In Chinese culture, this phenomenon is commonly called “ghost pressing on the bed” or “ghost pressing on the body.”

Many years ago, I experienced something very strange myself—an experience that I still remember vividly.

A Strange Experience

At the time, I had just purchased my first home in Irvine, California.

Because I usually left a small gap in the bedroom door or window while sleeping, the room sometimes became quite cold during the night.

It was during this period that I began experiencing something very unusual.

Quite often, just five to ten minutes after lying down in bed, I would suddenly have an intense sensation:

It felt as though someone was pressing down on my body.

It did not feel like an ordinary dream.

My mind seemed to be completely conscious. I knew where I was lying, but my body simply would not respond. I tried to get up, but I could not. I tried to move my arms and legs, but they would not move. Most frightening of all, I wanted to scream, but I could not make a sound.

It was an extremely uncomfortable and terrifying experience.

And it did not happen just once.

During that period, something like this happened almost every night.

Looking back now, I realize how frightening it can be when someone is fully aware of their surroundings but suddenly discovers that they cannot move their body. When they feel as though something is pressing on their chest and they cannot call for help, the fear and helplessness are difficult to describe.

At the time, I had no idea what was happening.

I simply thought, “How strange!”

Could there really be something in the room?

Could this actually be what people call “ghost pressing”?

Something Even More Amazing Happened Later

Several months later, I was baptized in church.

After that, something happened that made a particularly deep impression on me.

One night, I experienced the same kind of episode again.

I felt as though I was being pressed down. I could not move my body, and I could not call out.

But this time, something different happened.

A very clear image suddenly appeared in my mind:

Jesus, dressed in white.

At that moment, I do not know why, but I immediately thought of Jesus.

I began desperately calling out in my mind:

“Jesus, save me! Jesus, save me!”

What happened next was truly amazing to me. As soon as I called out, the sensation of being pressed down immediately disappeared.

My body suddenly became free again.

I could move. I could breathe normally and speak.

This experience left a very deep impression on me.

From a rational, human perspective, there may be several possible explanations. But from the perspective of my personal faith, that moment felt completely real.

I believe that the name of Jesus gave me strength and that the Holy Spirit delivered me from fear.

What Does Medicine Say About “Ghost Pressing”?

Looking back on this experience today, I have learned that modern medicine has conducted extensive research into this phenomenon.

In medical terms, it is generally known as sleep paralysis.

Sleep paralysis typically occurs when a person is falling asleep or waking up. The mind becomes partially or fully conscious, but the body is still experiencing the temporary muscle paralysis associated with REM sleep.

In other words:

The brain has awakened, but the body has not completely awakened yet.

REM, or rapid eye movement sleep, is an important stage of sleep during which vivid dreams often occur. During this stage, the brain temporarily inhibits most skeletal muscle activity so that we do not physically act out our dreams.

Under normal circumstances, we are unaware of this process.

However, if consciousness returns before the body’s muscle inhibition has ended, a strange state can occur:

The person is already “awake,” but the body is still unable to move.

This is sleep paralysis.

Medical descriptions of sleep paralysis are remarkably similar to what I experienced:

• Temporary inability to move the body;
• Inability to speak or call out;
• A sensation of pressure on the chest;
• The feeling that someone or something is present in the room;
• Extremely vivid visual, auditory, or tactile experiences;
• Intense fear and helplessness.

The Cleveland Clinic explains that people experiencing sleep paralysis may be conscious but unable to move or speak. They may also feel pressure on their chest or sense that a threatening presence is nearby. An episode usually lasts from a few seconds to several minutes.

Medical research has also found that sleep paralysis can involve vivid experiences of an “intruder” or a sense of pressure on the body. Some people feel that an unfamiliar and frightening presence is in the room, while others feel as though something is pressing on their chest.

Therefore, from the perspective of modern medicine, my experience closely resembles the typical symptoms of sleep paralysis.

Why Does It Feel as Though Someone Is Actually Pressing on You?

This is one of the most frightening aspects of sleep paralysis.

If the only symptom were an inability to move, perhaps it would not be quite so terrifying.

What makes it so frightening is this:

The sensation feels incredibly real.

Researchers believe that during the transition between sleep and wakefulness, dream-related experiences associated with REM sleep may enter conscious awareness.

As a result, a person may simultaneously experience two seemingly contradictory realities:

“I know I am in my bedroom.”

And:

“I also feel that someone is in the room.”

Some people see shadowy figures. Others hear voices, feel someone standing beside the bed, or experience pressure on their chest.

Medical sources explain that hallucination-like experiences associated with falling asleep or waking up can involve vision, hearing, touch, or a sense of movement. Such experiences do not necessarily indicate that a person has a mental illness.

Some laboratory studies have also documented vivid hallucination-like experiences associated with REM sleep, showing that the transition between sleep and wakefulness can involve unusual states of consciousness.

So, from a medical perspective, the sensation of someone pressing down on you does not necessarily mean that a real person or supernatural entity is present.

But that does not change one important fact:

For the person experiencing it, the sensation is real and extremely frightening.

Why Do Different Cultures Interpret This Experience Differently?

This raises a fascinating question.

Stories resembling “ghost pressing” exist in many parts of the world.

Some cultures interpret the experience as the work of ghosts. Others associate it with demons, spirits, or supernatural beings. Certain religious traditions may understand it as an experience involving the spiritual world.

For example, medical and cultural studies have found that in Turkey, some people who experience sleep paralysis associate it with a traditional phenomenon known as Karabasan. Some people respond by praying or reciting passages from the Quran.

Another study published in Transcultural Psychiatry explored the relationship between sleep paralysis and spiritual experiences. Researchers noted that a common feature of sleep paralysis is the feeling that a threatening, nonphysical presence is nearby. This helps explain why many people naturally interpret the experience through a religious or spiritual framework.

This leads to a very interesting observation:

The same physical and psychological experience may be interpreted in completely different ways depending on a person’s cultural background.

In China, people may call it “ghost pressing on the bed.”

A Christian may think of demons or spiritual warfare.

A Muslim may interpret it through the traditions of Islam.

Modern medicine calls it sleep paralysis.

Why Did the Experience Disappear When I Called Out, “Jesus, Save Me”?

This is probably the part of my experience that left the deepest impression on me.

From a purely medical perspective, one possible explanation is that when a person experiencing sleep paralysis suddenly focuses on escaping the episode, changes in attention, emotion, and arousal may help the brain transition fully into wakefulness.

Medical guidance sometimes suggests trying to focus on small movements, such as moving one finger and then gradually moving other parts of the body. For some people, this may help them regain movement more quickly.

Therefore, science can offer one possible explanation:

My calling out may have coincided with the moment my brain was completing its transition out of sleep paralysis.

However, for me, the experience has another important meaning.

I had been baptized, and this was the first time I clearly thought of Jesus during one of these terrifying episodes.

When I saw Jesus in my mind, dressed in white, and cried out, “Jesus, save me,” I felt an overwhelming sense of security.

That experience meant more to me than simply a medical phenomenon.

It became a deeply personal experience of faith.

Must Science and Faith Be Mutually Exclusive?

I do not think they necessarily have to be.

Science asks:

“How might this phenomenon occur in the human body and brain?”

Faith often asks a different question:

“When we face fear, death, the unknown, and things we cannot explain, where can we place our hearts and find peace?”

These are not exactly the same question.

We can acknowledge that, from a medical perspective, my experience was very likely sleep paralysis.

At the same time, I can also acknowledge that, for me personally, the sense of security and strength I experienced when calling out to Jesus was real.

Medicine may explain why my body could not move, but it cannot simply determine what that experience means to me spiritually.

Likewise, a person’s religious experience cannot, by itself, prove that all episodes of sleep paralysis are supernatural.

It is best to consider these two dimensions separately.

The Power of Jesus’ Name in the Bible

For Christians, the name of Jesus holds special significance.

In Luke 10, the seventy-two disciples returned and told Jesus:

“Lord, even the demons submit to us in your name.”

Jesus then spoke about authority over the enemy.

Philippians 2 also emphasizes the supreme position of Jesus’ name, describing it as “the name that is above every name” and teaching that every knee will bow before Christ.

For ordinary Christians, there are also comforting words in Scripture.

Psalm 4:8 says:

“In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.”

Proverbs 3:24 says:

“When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.”

These verses have a special connection to nighttime, fear, sleep, and the sense of security that faith can provide.

Looking Back on That Experience Today

Many years later, when I look back on what happened, I no longer simply attribute everything to ghosts.

I now understand that modern medicine has developed a substantial body of research on sleep paralysis.

Sleep paralysis itself is usually harmless. However, if it happens frequently, it may be associated with insufficient sleep, irregular sleep schedules, sleep apnea, narcolepsy, or other sleep-related problems.

If someone experiences sleep paralysis repeatedly, especially together with severe daytime sleepiness, they should consider consulting a doctor or sleep specialist.

But knowing the medical explanation does not mean I have to dismiss my personal experience of faith.

That experience taught me something important about myself:

When a person is overwhelmed by fear, what can help them find strength again?

For me, the answer is Jesus.

Perhaps medicine can explain why my body could not move at that moment.

Perhaps neuroscience can explain why I saw or felt certain things.

But when I was at my most frightened, I saw Jesus in my mind and cried out:

“Jesus, save me!”

And then the fear disappeared.

For me, that moment was more than just a sleep-related experience.

It was a very special experience in my life.

Whether we understand it as sleep paralysis, a spiritual experience, or a combination of experiences that I cannot fully explain, I believe it is something each person may reflect on for themselves.

What I do know is this:

When I think back on that period, I no longer think first of ghosts. I think of Jesus.

Because in that darkest, most frightening, and most helpless moment,

I remembered one name—Jesus.